World Cup? I prefer a D Cup.

Did you like that title? You should have. I made a joke. A Mick Aloha joke. Those are the best jokes. Here's another one for you...

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Give me your money!

That one still gets to me no matter how many times I tell it. Here's another...

Knocker knocker.
Who's there?
Show me your knockers!

Let me tell you about this idea I once had. If you like it, send me a dollar, and by dollar, I mean ten dollars. Twenty. Twenty dollars.

So, my idea was you're at the pool relaxing just minding your own business when you spot a hottie. Now, the hottie is wearing a bikini and laying facedown on one of those pool chairs that lie flat. Another detail is that this hottie has undone the back of her bra...I mean bikini top...so that she can get an even tan on her back. So, my big idea was to go over and grab her ass. Now, I know what you're thinking, let me stop you there. You're thinking "That's such a great idea, why didn't I think of it?" Well, you're right, it is a great idea. You didn't think of it because I'm me and you're not and I rule and you should send me your money. See you in the next paragraph.

All right, so you grab her ass and what happens next? Well, if she's startled, she'll jump up and you'll get the show of your life. The other possibility is that she'll realize the dangers of jumping up quickly and start refastening her bra...I mean bikini top. At that point, you should run. Actually, in either case you should run. Worst case scenario is you get to grab her ass. Best case is ass grab and a show.

I've been thinking about this. Worst case is probably jail, which is a place I don't want to go to. Respect women, you bunch of filthy assholes. Forget I even told you my secret thoughts.

Let's end on a joke. My wiener.